One of the most profound lessons of parenthood is how much society still lags behind in supporting modern parenting roles. For all the progress we’ve made, there’s still a pervasive notion that fathers are merely “babysitters” of their own children. Let me make this clear: I will never babysit Ms. Nola Nerd Baby. I am her parent.
Adventures with Ms. Nola Nerd Baby
The Nola Nerd Baby is always ready for an adventure! Our little one is well-behaved, and we’ve made it a priority to only take her to baby-friendly places. We avoid five-star restaurants or places where a crying baby might disrupt others. Instead, we frequent locations that are naturally noisy, so if she does cry, it won’t be a big deal.
That said, we’ve been fortunate—she hasn’t caused a ruckus yet. And if she ever does, one of us will step outside with her. So far, every server we’ve encountered has fawned over her (and, yes, we admit we’re biased, but she is the cutest).
The Need for Inclusive Parenting Spaces for Modern Parenting Roles
One thing we both wish for, however, is more inclusive spaces for parents, especially when it comes to baby-changing stations. Too many places still only have changing tables in the women’s restroom, leaving fathers in a bind.
While we understand that older restaurants might find it challenging to retrofit their facilities, newer establishments have no excuse for not doing so. Including a changing station in the men’s restroom should be a standard part of modern restroom design.
Additionally, we urge designers not to place changing tables in the accessible stall. While it may seem like a logical solution due to space constraints, it inadvertently deprives a facility meant for individuals with special needs. Fathers like me are fully capable of tending to our children, and my wife deserves the occasional break. Restaurants and venues should reflect this in their designs.
Baby-Friendly Venues: The Good, the Bad, and the Poopy
We’ve seen some great examples of baby-friendly design. For instance, both the Audubon Zoo and Disney World provide excellent facilities for changing babies in the men’s restrooms. Unfortunately, not all venues follow suit.
Recently, we visited a location where none of the bathrooms had a dedicated changing station. When Ms. Nola Nerd Baby had a major blowout, I had to improvise and create a makeshift changing space. While we’ll always figure it out, having a proper, designated space would make things much easier for parents.
To Those Who Judge Parents Taking Babies Out
Before anyone rolls their eyes about us taking our baby out in public, let us address a common concern: We didn’t bring her to crowded places until she had her first round of vaccinations. We also ensure that no one outside of the family touches her in public spaces. (Side note: A big thank-you to everyone who has respected this boundary—it means a lot!)
Right now, we’re enjoying every moment of taking Ms. Nola Nerd Baby out into the world. She loves it, especially people-watching. If you carry her, be prepared—she insists on being carried facing forward so she doesn’t miss anything!
Final Thoughts: A Call for Baby-Friendly Design
Parenting is a shared responsibility, and it’s time for society to catch up. Fathers are not babysitters—we are parents. Making public spaces more inclusive for both moms and dads is a simple yet impactful way to support modern families.
So to all the restaurants, venues, and designers out there: Please include baby-changing stations in both restrooms, and plan them thoughtfully. Parents like us—and, more importantly, our babies—will thank you.
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