Parenting: Parenting Roles

I’ve been reading the DC comic of the Flintsontes from 2016. Its a devestatingly good comic that I’m reading awful slowly just to savor it. Last night I came across this panel.

I have admitted how scared I was about the birth of our daughter. I didn’t know if I was ready to be a father.  

Best moment of my life

Our baby was born, and I was still scared.  How do we sleep when she can’t?  How do I be there for my wife and go back to work? 

Then we had to rush my wife to the hospital, not once, but three times. (Please go here if you want to read the complete story).  When my wife was finally admitted, she was told she needed rest. I offered for me and the baby to stay.  My wife said no, she needed rest and the baby needed rest.  I can’t imagine how hard that must have been for her to say, but I do know that was the hardest thing I ever did. 

However, I couldn’t let my wife know that.  She needed to know I was confident enough to do it. And for the first time, I was.  She needed me to be strong because she couldn’t, and the baby needed me to protect her and make sure she survives.  There is no better motivation than that. 

The Nola Nerd Baby sleeping on me while mommy was in the hospital. 

You see, Fred is right.  We only have two roles, but the second one is everything. Let’s face, there are only two things we can’t do: we can’t have the kid and we can’t breastfeed.  However, as dads, we can do everything else.  And with modern technology we can still feed our children. We can change diapers, we can sing songs, we can dress and feed them. We can do everything. And the thing I’ve learned with the Nola Nerd Baby is she wants me to do everything. She wants to be near me. She wants to make me smile, because that’s the real reasons babies smiles. They want to see you smile.  

The Nola Nerd Trio

So I’ve learned that my role is to be a parent. We can put gender roles on things, but at the end of the day and at this point in our child’s life, I can do everything she needs me to do to protect her. So can my wife. 

And you know we will. 

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